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| yellowcard is sex.
things are fucked up right now and i'm not talking about what happened with me, amy, and can.
it's not them or what happened between us, i'm the one that's fucked up. | | |
| Today I walked around downtown with Joanne and I met some of her SHA friends. They're pretty cool.. lol and they were all like "IF YOU COME NEXT YEAR, YOU CAN SUFFER WITH US!!"
Then I went to Ala Moana with my mom to pick up her Friends DVD. When she told me I thought she meant that she was going to pick up a DVD for her friend. Anyways, that wasn't the case. Oh Lord, THE HOTTEST GUY EVER WORKS AT SAM GOODY. =) Yummay. Skinny tall haole boy with brown layered shoulder-length hair. Now THAT'S THE WAY I LIKE IT [UH-HUH UH-HUH]. ;D Sam Goody was understaffed tonight and the guy at the register was REALLY clueless on how to do checks .. so we probably stood there for a good 10 or 20 minutes. I'm not complaining though. =)
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| >> "I HATE CARING S0 MUCH, WHEN I D0N'T GET ANYTHING 0UT OF IT."
If I said that, would you call it a selfish love? Well, not that I have anyone to share any kind of personal, guy-girl relationship with ... but it's not selfish to say I hated caring when I'm not recieving any compensation from the other end, right?
I hate being so bitter&jealous. It turns me into someone that I'm not and never want to be. But it always seems to get me sometime. I don't understand why I always have to be the one to deal with this load of crap. For once, why can't I be his number one? Why do I have to play sloppy seconds all the time? For once in my life, why can't I be "THE 0NE" instead of "THE 0NE LEFT BEHIND"?
I always tell everyone, "B0YS ARE N0T W0RTH IT", but do I really believe that? If I did, then why have I been sitting here depressed since yesterday? So call me a hypocrite. Go ahead, because I could care less now. I'm so L0ST ...
...
LET Y0UR WAVES CRASH D0WN 0N ME
LET THEM WASH MY C0LD TEARS AWAY
LET Y0UR WARMTH ENVEL0P ME
LET IT S00THE MY BITTER PAIN
LET Y0UR BEAUTY APALL ME
LET IT EASE MY TR0UBLED MIND
...
xx nikki | | |
| LAST XANGA M0VE ... I PR0MISE ... =)
// let your waves crash down
on me and take me away \\
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